Misc from Phil
- The Muppet Show
- You'll Never Get to Heaven
- On Top of Spaghetti
- Quatermaster's Stores
- Boom Chick a Boom
- The Other day
- Singing in the Rain
1. "The Muppet Show" (Opening)
Kermit: It's the Muppet Show with our Very Special Guest Star, ...
Females: It's time to play the music
It's time to light the lights
It's time to meet the Muppets on the Muppet Show
tonight.
Males: It's time to put on makeup
It's time to dress up right
It's time to raise the curtain on the Muppet Show
tonight.
Waldorf: Why do we always come here
Statler: I guess we'll never know
Waldorf: It's like a kind of torture
both: To have to watch the show
(brief interlude)
Muppets: And now let's get things started
Audience: Why don't you get things started
Kermit: It's time to get things started
Muppets: on the most sensational inspirational celebrational
Muppetational
this is what we call the Muppet Show!
(Bob blows his Organ )
2. YOU'LL NEVER GET TO HEAVEN
I Oh you'll never get to heaven
In a bottle of jin
Cos the lord won't let
No spirit's in
Wo Oh Oh you'll never get to heaven
In a bottle of jin
Cos the lord won't let
No spirit's in
I ain't gonna grieve my lord no more-ore-ore
I ain't gonna grieve my lord
I ain't gonna grieve my lord
I ain't gonna grieve my lord no more-ore-ore
II In a biscuit tin
Cos a biscuit tin, got bickies in.
III On a pane of glass
Cos a pane of glass, will cut your........elbow
IV In a girl guides bra
Cos a girl guides bra won't stretch that far
[Finishing with]
V Oh if you get to heaven
Before I do
Just dig a hole
And pull me through
[Then]
VI Oh if I get to heaven
Before you do
I'll dig a hole
And pull you through
3. ON TOP OF SPAGHETTI
On top of spaghetti
All covered in cheese
I lost my poor meatball
When somebody sneezed
It rolled off the table
And onto the floor
And then my poor meatball
It rolled out the door
It rolled down the garden
And under a bush
And then my poor meatball
Was nothing but mush
(moral)
If you have spaghetti
All covered in cheese
Hold onto your meatball
Cos someone might sneeze.
4. QUATERMASTER'S STORES
Choras My eyes are dim, I cannot see,
I have not brought my specs with me,
I have not brought my specs with me
I There were Fleas, Fleas
Doing a striptease in the stores, in the stores
There were Fleas, Fleas
Doing a striptease in the Quatermasters stores
II There were beans, beans
Wearing wrangler jeans
III There was gravy, gravy
Enough to feed the navy
IV There was beer, beer
The colour of diahorrea
V There was cheese, cheese
With awful knobbly knees
5. BOOM CHICK A BOOM
I said a boom
I said a boom chick a boom
I said a boom chick a lacka,
chick a lacka, chick a boom
Ah - Ha
Oh - Yeh
Next time
were gonna do it like a ..... ?.....
French man .... Acent
German .... Acent
Mexican .... Acent
Jamician .... Acent
Annette Hay .... Really quite and shy !
Rod Bain .... Shout very loudly
6. THE OTHER DAY
[ Each line is sung out by one person and repeated by everyone else
after which all four lines in succession are sung at the end of each
verse]
I The other day
I met a bear
Up in the woods
Away up there
II He looked at me
I loked at him
He sized up me
I sized up him
III He said to me
Why don't you run
I see you ain't
Got any gun
IV And so I ran
Away from there
And right behind
Me was that bear
V And then I saw
Ahead of me
A great big tree
O lordy me
VI The nearest branch
Was ten feet up
I'd have to jump
And trust my luck
VII And so I jumped
Into the air
But I missed that branch
Away up there
VIII But thats alright
No don't you frown
Cause I caught that branch
On the way back down
IX Now that's all there is
There ain't no more
unless I meet
That bear once more
Learned from Orla "scruffy" Murphy Dundalk S.A.I. 17-7-94
Waterfront, Blackrock
7. SINGING IN THE RAIN
I I'm singing in the rain
just singing in the rain
what a glorious feeling
I'm ha-ha-happy again
(everyone else)
ARMS OUT (ARMS OUT)
WRISTS TOGETHER (WRISTS TOGETHER)
A ruch cha cha, a ruch cha cha, a ruch, cha cha cha
A ruch cha cha, a ruch cha cha, a ruch, cha cha cha
II I'm singing in the rain
just singing in the rain
what a glorious feeling
I'm ha-ha-happy again
THUMBS UP (THUMBS UP)
FEET TOGETHER (FEET TOGETHER)
[Repeat as above adding on]
III Elbows bent (Elbows bent)
Knees bent (Knees bent)
IV Chest out (Chest out)
Bums out (Bums out)
V Tongues out (Tongues out)
[Finishing with]
VI I'm singing in the rain
just singing in the rain
what a glorious feeling
I'm ha-ha-happy again
Sit down
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